Relationships

Guys have come between girls since since girls started liking guys. But girls getting angry at each other doesn't do anything to change the situation with the guys they like.

You and your BFF have a lot in common, and it's inevitable that you are sometimes going to like the same guy. After all, how many cute, funny, nice guys can there be in one school? And while it seems to be okay if you both drool over Taylor Lautner's 12-pack, it's a whole other story when it's a guy you might actually have a chance with (hope we're not crushing any Taylor dreams!). Alison liked Nick for two years, and during that time, Jenny decided she liked him, too. Because Alison was her best friend, Jenny never said a word. But somehow, as often happens, Alison heard that Jenny shared her crush. Suddenly, Alison started spending time with friends other than Jenny. They talk, but they're no longer BFF.

But Jenny didn't do anything! That's so unfair, you might be thinking. And you're right. Alison wasn't afraid that Jenny might try to steal Nick away from her. She was afraid that Nick might like Jenny, too. Since she didn't want to distance herself from Nick, she distanced herself from Jenny instead. Jenny was hurt over feelings she never acted on but couldn't control, and still, neither of them had the guy.

It might be easy to see that Alison treated Jenny unfairly when you're reading about people you don't know. But if you were in Alison's shoes, how would you react to learning that your best friend likes your crush? Your instinct might be to get angry, but if your friend is worth it, you'll sit down and talk to her instead. When you do, talk about the three possibilities that could arise:

1. He likes you, and not your friend.

If this happens, there's certainly no reason for you to treat your friend badly. He likes you; she's no threat to your relationship unless you're insecure enough to feel like she is. Be considerate of her feelings. Don't share every word of your late-night texts, or tell her how he flirted with you all through math class.

2. He likes your best friend, and not you.

Obviously, this isn't the way you want it to go, but if he likes your friend, you need to keep telling yourself that getting mad at her isn't going to make him like you more. Middle school relationships don't usually last too long, but girl friendships can last a lifetime. Tell her you'd prefer not to hear every last detail, treat her the way you'd like to be treated, and gracefully ride it out.

3. He doesn't like either one of you.

At least Taylor Lautner doesn't know you; what's this guy's problem? Whatever it is, it isn't yours. Shared misery will probably bring you and your BFF closer than ever as you share sob stories about the unworthiness of the girl he does like. And then you can work together to find new crushes — one for each of you.